Sunday, June 26, 2005

[falling]

Todd: Aren't you scared of falling?

the Sandman: It is sometimes a mistake to climb; it is always a mistake never even to make the attempt.

Todd: What are you saying? That I ought to go back to the show? Not walk out? Is that what you're saying? ... You're just a dream. Listen, I've made up my mind.

the Sandman: If you do not climb you will not fall. This is true. But is it that bad to fail, that hard to fall? ... Sometimes you wake, and sometimes, yes, you die. ... But there is a third alternative.

- from "the Sandman: Fear of Falling"

**************

Currently unusually really really happy. Many thanks to you Dream King.

Tuesday, June 21, 2005

[the dreaming, part 1]

Woke up from a wierd dream a while ago. I think I remember saying somewhere in this blog that I'll be posting some of the wierdest dreams I have. So here it is, the first dream post. It's not exactly the weirdest but it's certainly the funniest. (Most of the wierdest dreams I've had I can't remember anymore. haha)

I slept in Brian's room sa H5 (kina Celsus), which I've been doing almost everyday now because of DOTA (A Defense of the Ancients - Warcraft Custom Map, for those who don't know) practice and the usual monitoring of downloads. Tska tinatamad kasi ako palagi umuwi. Tska wala pa kasi si Brian kaya solo ko yung gamit ng PC.

Anyway about the dream, as far as I can recall, it started with me and my siblings, all six of us, bumming around at home (sa Baguio). For some reason the Full House soundtrack (oo. yung Koreanovela) was playing in the background, specifically, the song "Why?" (yung madramang kanta na lalaki yung vocalist).

After that, again for some odd reason, I suddenly remembered that the Dark Oracles of the Five Elements (from the Legend of the Five Rings) were going to attack our home. Ewan ko kung bakit basta ganun daw (It's funny how everything in a dream makes perfect sense but when you wake up, the dream's logic is all messed-up).

The Dark Oracles are a handful of evil beings suffused by the corrupted power of the Shadowlands, so I knew there was no way we could fight against them. There was no time so I had to figure a way to save us and then I remembered that however powerful they are, the Dark Oracles are bound by rules in the Celestial Order. They have limits. A Dark Oracle can only attack you If you attack them first, or if someone who has possession of the Dark Covenant Commands them to do so. So all you had to do was to not attack them, If someone did send them to kill us well.. it's over. Either way, I had to warn my brothers and sisters or at least tell everybody to escape or something.

Ang problema, biglang tumaas yung volume ng FullHouse soundtrack. Naka-full volume. Sa sobrang taas ng volume hindi na 'ko maring ng mga kapatid ko. The Oracles were coming soon and I had to warn them quick, so I lowered the volume from the speakers. Nothing happened, the volume was still too loud. So I closed Winamp, but still the song was playing. There was one thing left to do, I pushed the power button to force shutdown the computer. Wala pa rin nangyari. I knew then that we were doomed.

And then I woke up. And Brian was already there with the computer on. And the FullHouse Soundtrack was playing in the background. Na mataas yung volume. ...Kaya pala hindi ko mapatay yung Winamp. Brian, you bastard, you just killed my whole family.

LOL.

Monday, June 20, 2005

[horoscopes. ack]

"Your awareness of the nuances of the situation -- and the feelings involved -- puts you in a much better position than those who are blundering blindly forward. In fact, you may be called upon to lead them. --read more...."

"You know you have to do the right thing, but you don't know if you have the strength to see it through right now. Well, guess what? You do. Having courage doesn't mean being unafraid -- only idiots have no fear -- but it does mean acknowledging the fear and doing what needs to be done anyway, because you know it has to be done. So take a deep breath, and have some faith in yourself." - taken from today's Friendster Horoscope thingie.

Malakas talaga sa chambahan ang horoscope. I don't believe in horoscopes and I normally dismiss horoscope coincidences like this but.. well, here it is. Posted. The damn thing hit me right on target.

Being the irresponsible, lazy, procrastinating, carefree college bum that I am, I don't think a lot of people think I'm cut out for leader work. I don't think I am either. But I'll do my best.

Just wait and see what happens.

Friday, June 17, 2005

[copy, paste, edit. and be an asshole]

Read "A Geriatric's Power Trip" from the Marocharim Experiment then read this article from a certain lame FilipinoFriendFinder Journal. Spot the difference or rather, the non-difference.

For the benefit of those who don't know, plagiarism is using another's work (writings, ideas, and such) without giving the original author credit. It's when you copy, paste, edit and pass it off as your own.

Marck, give the bitch HELL.

Saturday, June 11, 2005

[back to school]

College is like constipation: A long and hard struggle to get that big piece of shit out of your ass. Kung iisipin mo rin, sembreak is when you pause to catch some air before you go back to pushing the shit down again. And graduation is when your crap finally comes out.

I hate it when I get constipated. But it happens and there's nothing you can do but to get it over with. Right now its that part of the process where I have to start pushing the shit down again. With a big sigh of relief at the end the only thing motivating me.

Monday, June 06, 2005

[join the fold]

I was reading some Ctrl Alt Del archive comic strips when I stumbled upon one of the strips that mentioned George R. R. Martin's "A Game of Thrones". I was like, "Hoh shit! ASTIG! nagbabasa siya ng 'Song of Ice and Fire!' ...Astig." For those interested, see the strip here: click me

What's the big deal? ASTIG ang "Song of Ice and Fire". Tska wala lang, it's nice when you find a fellow fan. So uhh.. wala lang. Walang kwentang post.

Anyway, READ Song of Ice and Fire.
(...If you can't find the books anywhere you can always e-mail me for e-books :D)

But you know what, this kind of thing should be called something. I dunno, fan recruitment? You know, that thing when somebody comes up to (or maybe during a conversation - it would be weird if somebody suddenly comes up to you..) and tells you to "READ THIS BOOK! It's the greatest thing that has ever happened to the world of fantasy since Wheel of Time! You must read it! You don't know what you're missing!" or when somebody tells you to "play this game. it's FRIGGIN' awesome." It's when a superfan will express his dismay at your lack of knowledge and how much you're missing by not partaking of the graces of his ...addiction.

Wala lang. It's funny when superfans do that (or maybe I should say, when us superfuns do that..). yeah. Sometimes you just can't help it. Sometimes you just feel that you have to reach out and "spread the word" and tell people how much their missing or something like that.

It's weird when you're reading this really incredible book or playing this absolute masterpiece of a game and find that you're just doing it alone and enjoying it by yourself. And so to fight you're loneliness (lol. andrama) you go on some kind of crusade and try to convince everybody of how great this particular book or game or show, or in my case, this CCG (Collectible Card Game - like L5R - still trying to get people to play...) is and try to convert them and take them into the fold.

(EDIT) note: here are some examples from a couple of Ctrl Alt Del strips: click me and me too (wow. I seem to be doing a lot of ADVERTISING for Tim Buckley here. hm...)

Ewan. It's just that sometimes you just feel alone. Like in this particular case where I've been geeking out about Legend of the Five Rings stories and Kotei tournaments for weeks and there's just no one out there (in my immediate proximity or range) that I can relate to. I mean.. L5R is the best CCG ever with its diverse mythology (created solely by the game designers and fans) and story and great game design. Nothing beats this game's great mix of interactive storytelling and gameplay. Screw Magic: the Gathering. Magic is for noobs. <--- *ahem* See? there I go.

I feel like... the Lone Wolf..-nerd.
...Shit. I am.such.a.geek. But what the hell. Screw it. "For Winterfell!", "For Rokugan!!", "For Middlearth!!" "For Geekdom!!!"

Sunday, June 05, 2005

[on anime art]

I replied just now to Kubi's comment on [teh fool], a previous article about well, fools. As well as observation about how anime seems to have been going to shit lately.

My reply to her comment reminded me of an issue I've been wanting to talk about for a long time now. It's an issue I've been debating with myself and many of my fellow artists (especially with Da Toilets) ever since.. ever since. It's this issue I've always had about the standard anime-style or the general anime format and all its implications to an artist, especially originality. And identity.

Take note that the standard anime-style art or general anime format I'm talking about here is defined as the style that uses oversimplified facial features and expressions such as "big buggy eyes", colorful hair, a pointy nose, a line for a mouth, as well as the use of a popping vein on either side of the temple (to signify anger) or a large sweatdrop (for embarassment) to signify human emotional reactions. Also, the style uses a form of shading that shows distinct separations between color highlights, shadows and flats much similar to vector art. There.

I should also note that I think this particular issue started with my older brother Xian, or "Kuya" among us siblings - who is ultimately my "sensei" in almost everything (especially drawing and art in general), warning me about the 'dangerous effects' of adapting an anime-style of drawing to my artstyle's originality during the early days of my development as an artist. And also like the typical student, I never really understood what he meant and went on to adapt this unique but unpopular form of art.

I think I was just 10 or 11 when he told me that. I think this age range also marked the beginnings of my addiction to anime (the good ol' days of Macross/Robotech, Akira, Ghost in the Shell, Dragonball and Ranma 1/2).

To explain the issue further
(and please be patient, because reason is something that comes long and hard for me), Because of the recent upgrade of anime and manga from a sort of obscure underground form of animation and comicbook art (repectively) to UBER mainstream-ness through GMA 7's "anime r us" campaign which I think is also the cause of the recent MMORPG boom in the country (those half-assed abominations that call themselves RPGs. Oh how I hate you Ragnarok - but not now... perhaps I shall flame you another time), almost EVERY youngblood artist today has become an anime artist.

It's very easy to notice. Everywhere you look you see anime posters and art
(Ragnarok to be specific). Everything is anime these days. And so to make things short and direct, as well as to avoid me having an endless rant about how far and low anime has fallen, my point here is that mainstream's corruption of anime is slowly creeping its way into the youngblood pop-artist.

I've already outgrown the argument that only Japanese animators and mangakas can draw in the style of "anime". (Besides, anime has already developed a culture that is no longer exclusively Japanese - Korea also has its own anime). It's not the issue of Japanese culture or anything like that that concerns me and in fact, I actually like this sudden boom of Asian culture across the world. It's the issue of originality and identity I'm really after. Creativity and innovation is slowly being lost.

Simply put, all these pinoy youngblood artists are starting to lose themselves in the crowd of anime artists. And two or three years ago I know I almost lost myself in that same crowd. I realized that the soul of my art was slowly being choked and smothered by anime.
For the past three or four years I've been trying to create my own style. I've been trying to break free of the crowd. I realized that anime-art was like this box that I couldn't think out of. My artstyle was confined and was prevented from growing by a limited set of rules I eventually found that I could break. I was free and I was ready to begin. Again.

I started by making my art look different from the rest. I started with that and learned to mix other methods, mediums, and styles of art and
then I proceeded to master the pencil (haha. thank you deviantART for showing me the way. and for teaching me my weaknesses and helping me discover my strengths). So I wanted to eventually created a style that people will be able to identify as mine. Right now I'm still trying to create a style that people can really say is "uniquely" mine. But I won't stop there.

If possible, I'd create something entirely different or something that has never been done before. I want current artists to achieve greater things and not be content and SETTLE for an artstyle that looks so "typical anime" or worse, "bastardized anime" (because you have to admit, only Japanese can do that unique anime look.)

It should be every artist's quest to create ART that is uniquely his own.
I'm not trying to say that anime artists should stop drawing like that and go back to traditional, or draw something more realistic or move entirely to a different genre of art or something like that. I just want these artists to take the anime style that they grew up on and take it to the next level. Make it more unique, more different, an artstyle that is a true reflection of themselves, more them. I want them to step out of the crowd and stand out.

I'm not saying I'm already there and that my art is already definitely original but I'm working on it. The path of the artist is a long, hard and endless road.

I'll get there someday. I will not settle.

Saturday, June 04, 2005

[batman begins]

batman begins batman begins batman begins batman begins batman begins oh yeah batman begins batman begins batman begins batman wielding a friggin KATANA batman begins batman begins batman begins batman begins katie holmes... hehe batman begins batman begins batman begins batman begins hehe batman begins

Friday, June 03, 2005

[webcomics]

I've been doing nothing but travel the big big ocean that is the web all week. Friggin comsci instructors just won't show up no matter how hard I look for them so I decided "to Jigoku with removals, I shall bum out instead and enjoy the last few days of summer. " And so I did.

Walang ginawa kundi mag-L5R forums sa net, download artbooks, sourcebooks, OSTs, crazy Flash movies, and other random stuff. Check friendster, go to bulletinboards and answer worthless "surveys", login on deviantart (and enjoy my one week free trial subsciption), answer personality tests and random quizzes and post stupid worthless things in my blog.

But then after a while pucha nagsawa rin ako. Naubusan ako ng gagawin sa net. Tapos biglang may idea na lumabas sa utak ko. Nagbasa ako ng webcomics. Tapos ang nangyari, ASTIG.

I dont feel like writing anything long (since a looong story. at sobrang tagal ko nag-browse sa kung anu-anong webcomic sites..) so let's just put it like this: parang inspired nanaman ako gumawa ng comics.

Basta yun. Can't really explain it. They just got me all excited again about making stories and drawing. Siguro out of envy pero ewan ko. I suddenly want to create a webcomic of my own. Or go back to the stories I've been trying to write before. Recover and restart my abandoned projects.
..Ewan. Basta, parang gusto ko lang talaga ulit gumawa ng comics.

READ these webcomics:

Ctrl Alt Del - they're just the best. crazy l337ness. -
highly recommended-
Orneryboy - best designed webcomic I've ever seen. gothic art. great humor
Applegeeks - nice art. GREAT coloring. has a nice continuous story.
NuklearPower - they use classic final fantasy sprites. thats enough for me.
VGCats - nice clean art. funny strips :D

Eto na yung pinaka-maganda kong nabasa.
the rest were just soso. Penny-arcade was also ok although I found that I couldnt really relate to the humor. And I really didn't like the art.
Hope you enjoy them as much as I have.